Bully Incident: – The Sewer (1974)

This is the second in my repeats of stories past as I have been writing my novel. I think many kids feared sewers, particularly after Stephen King released “IT”, certainly a book that tied to the fear of sewers. Since writing this story many years ago, I realize that things like feeling trapped or claustrophobic are common place feelings for people with C-PTSD damage from bullying or abuse. It is the idea of not being able to escape. To help confront this, I would force myself to sit in the middle at movie theaters, go to the barber and try not to panic in the barber chair and go to crowded places. Even though I wanted to run away at the height of my anxiety, I forced myself to stay through the panic attack and eventually, I stopped having them. There is only one way to go with anxiety, and that is confront it head on and go through it. Just as the kids who become adults do in Stephen King’s novel, IT. ~Alan Eisenberg


I have mentioned before how our brains have a tendency to put certain memories in the far backs of our heads. They are forgotten there, until sometimes a trigger can bring them forward.

Pretty much all of my stories I have told on this blog are from my days in Lexington, MA. But, something triggered me to remember the earliest incident I can recall the other day. I’ll call this the Sewer Incident. It’s more of a minor story, but still was an early bullying in my life. I don’t know why I had forgotten it, because when I recalled it, I realized how scary it was when I was only 6 years old in 1974.

We were living in Bowie, MD at the time. I was in 1st grade and took a long bus ride to school. I recall only fleeting memories of what happened, but my older sister was with me to help me recall more.

ITThe bus stop was at a sewer. I was a pretty small kid and, of course, there were kindergarten to 6th grade kids at the bus. One of the older kids had taken the sewer cap off the sewer. Of course these were very heavy metal things.

For some reason they chose me that day. They put me down in the sewer. I can’t recall if it was a bet or just a forced concept, but they made me climb down there. Then they put the lid back on it.

It was dark. I yelled for them to let me up. Instead they sat on it and taunted me from below. I recall just crying and being quite scared. Years later, the author Stephen King made me realize I was not alone in my fears of the dark sewer in his book “IT”.

My sister was yelling for them to stop and let me up. When they didn’t, she started running home and told them she was going to get my parents to come down. Once they heard that, they changed their minds and let me out.

OK, not the worst story and probably more of a joke to them than true bullying, but still something that scared a small 6 year old. I recall years later being offered the chance to go down the sewers at my college for what was billed as a fun night of sewer running by my college friends. I respectfully declined the invitation.

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The Elite Cyber-bullies (A Personal Story)

Sometimes, when I read a story, it is hard for me to connect with the writer, because their world of bullying is so much different from my experiences. Such is the case with this story and the world of elite hackers cyberbullying that is going on. It is hard to distinguish the pain that comes with what people post on the computer screens of the world, as is the case here. ~Alan


CyberbullyingCyber bullying for me started a few years ago when I was a member of a forum called elitehackers.info which now no longer exists. Yeah, this saga has lasted a while and these cyber bullies that are after me refuse to leave me alone. Back then I wanted to learn about computer security, infosec,…but I was not doing any thing bad on-line and had no bad intentions but some one got a different idea when I changed my nick to, “cy83r7r0n.”

At that point I was contacted by this low life called, “Nacky.” I guess it appeared like I was too hungry and really eager to get into black hat sort of stuff but she was wrong so when requested to crack into some ICQ e-mails I refused eventually out right and instead posted the entire conversation that took place on that forum to my site (that was hosted on a free account and removed by just one e-mail to the admin by Nacky) and later on my blog (was removed just as well with all the comments that the victim of the ICQ e-mail made) and that is where the abuse started because I refused to be silenced and continued posting that conversation and later on even the e-mails she sent to me on myspace and other bloging platforms.

Now I refer to her as a non-entity. Not just because I am pissed at her but that is how she referred to her self in one of the e-mails that she sent me over the years trying to confuse me and get me to believe that she was some outside observer and here is a typical e-mail from her,

“You may remember me, you had me confused with someone named Naky. I had contacted you some time ago trying to warn you about a Shawn person. I had gotten to the bottom of some things but not all re: elitehackers. Something about this Shawn guy and the admin there. I could resend the info I came into if you wish.”
I believe that she has mental issues as all e-mails that I have received from her show that she has an enormous problem writing any thing with a head and a tail and no clear idea is expressed and it always comes in rambling sentences with grammatical errors. Besides that I believe she is an individual who has been coerced into the abusive world of these cyber bullies who are using her as a proxy to as they are involved in various cyber crimes such as cracking into peoples e-mail accounts, harassment and they even put peoples personal information on the doxbin site that is hosted on the tor network and once there it can not be taken down (last year three Finish teens were arrested in relation to that:

http://occupypeace.blogspot.com/2013/10/scoop-doxbin-arrested.html),…

So when the initial phase was over two hate blogs were on line and are still on line to date:
http://lyecdevf-is-lame.blogspot.com/, (I would like to ask for help to get these two blogs removed), http://failtrolls.blogspot.com/2014/02/gregor-aka-lyecdevf-aka-cyber-cunt.html, (For now they can only attack my on line personality but they are determined to figure out who I am in real life), two abuse reports were made to Google, and I received a whole bunch of e-mails full of confusion and statements that angered me. So if any one is wondering why I am writing this it has in part to do with Nacky as well who writes to me in a way that equates me with some low life and I can not accept this type of attitude.

She was trying to shut me up her self for a while but she could not get Google to delete my account but then others steeped in. Who ever was behind all this wanted to shut me up. These cyber bullies do not want to see me post on line the conversation where I was asked over and over again to crack into an account by Nakcy because that is illegal as it is a solicitation to commit a hacker crime but it goes beyond that. They do not want to hear any one talk about there techniques, e-mails,…in fact they try to censor all posts including this one. So I would ask the admin already at this point in time to take note of that as this page is going to experience a lot of heat and I do not blame any admin who feels the need to remove this post.

Nevertheless as I am going to continue my campaign to shed light on these cyber bullies in spite of being aware that they are going to try and censor me and fill my e-mail in box with abrasive messages. I believe that some one needs to do some thing as they keep a very low profile so to try and keep undetected while they are just going go around hurting people unhampered. They are an organized group who may use proxies to log in to there stolen e-mails and stay in general clear of social media sites. Such behavior is not typical of cyber bullies and they may leave me alone on twitter but Shawn would e-mail me there comments about what I wrote on line in his poisoned demeanor.

Shawn is another non-entity who after Nakcy tried to shut me up and to intimidate me even further by threatening me in an e-mail where a picture of a dead snake and a picture of who he believes is me were included. His e-mail account he was using ended in “ucide.” It was all so clear to me and in my abuse report to google regarding the threatening e-mail I wrote that he may want me to commit suicide. Google seemed to respond quickly but after he received the message directly from the abuse department he wrote from the same e-mail account again to me the following, “I am cheering for you to commit suicide.” Apparently what ever google abuse department had to say to him did stop him from continuing sending the abusive e-mails to me. That is why in part I need to take things into my own hands as this non-entity has proven beyond doubt that he is the lowest scum who has anger management issues and the only thing out of his mouth is disdain and rage.
Many times I have received e-mails from these non-entities who seem to believe that they can trick me some how to stop exposing them down to outright threatening me. All this time they acted like I was the bad party and called me every thing from spamer, trol, creep,…They even forwarded to me an e-mail with a generic answer from the police abuse department when they made a general type complaint about an abusive person because they are trying to turn the tables and make it appear that I am the offensive party when it is the exact opposite.
The attitude is really some thing from some middle schoolers and that is one of the many things that angers me. They invest enormous amount of time and energy to silence me and for the last few years I let them get away with it but now I have had it. After I received another e-mail from Nacky after half a year of complete silence I decided to take this to a new step. I want to spread the word all over the net because for one I know they are going to try and censor this stuff from all the blogs but also because I would like to get advice on how to effectively deal with this issue appart from just sitting there quiet and never mentioning any thing. I do not believe that silence helps.

P.S: I have written this to post on blogs to inform people of what has been taking place during various intervals during the past several years. I would be willing to edit this if you were willing to post this on your site.


“The apocalypse is not something which is coming. The apocalypse has arrived in major portions of the planet and it’s only because we live within a bubble of incredible privilege and social insulation that we still have the luxury of anticipating the apocalypse. If you go to Bosnia or Somalia or Peru or much of the third-world then it appears that the apocalypse has already arrived.”

~Terence

What Is Cyberbullying Infographic

Sarah Bends shared a wonderful infographic about Cyberbullying with me to share with you. For those that have been following the infographic movement, it is such a great and creative way for communication artists to share information in a graphical setting. I hope you enjoy Sarah’s great infographic as much as I do. While it is a tough subject, her infographic makes the information easy to understand. To see Sarah’s site and the graphic on it directly, go to: http://www.calera.biz/what-is-cyberbullying-infographic. Thanks, Sarah for sharing.

Cyber-bullying Infographic

Using Fiction for Bully-Prevention Programs

Susan Coryell has been a good friend of my website and efforts for many years now. She had, a few years ago, written a wonderful novel on bullying called Eaglebait. Recently, Susan contacted me again and asked if she could share a blog on this site. I am honored to have her do so below. Ms. Coryell has a deep understanding of the complexity of the issue of bullying and the new diagnosis of C-PTSD that is now being defined by Psychiatric experts as what people who suffer for years afterward from the effects of bullying go through. ~Alan Eisenberg


EaglebaitBullying is universal, affecting every age group, ethnicity, and workplace, and the emotional damage can last, I believe, forever. Since the publication of my anti-bullying young adult novel Eaglebait, I have listened to hundreds of stories of bully victims.

As I prepared to host a panel discussion on bullying at a local library, I received a phone call from an elderly lady whom I will call Sylvia. “I’m bed-ridden and can’t attend your discussion tonight,” she told me in a shaky voice, “but I wanted to let you know my experience with bullying.” I listened as Sylvia hailed back to her school days where she was bullied from first grade until graduation because of her short stature and poverty. “We was poor but we was clean,” she stated. Many years later Sylvia attended a wedding. At the reception she spied one of her former bullies from grade school. “He tried to make nice and talk with me, but I turned my shoulder and refused. That’s how bad he hurt me. I still remembered the humiliation over fifty years later.”

Part of me wanted to suggest Sylvia try to forgive and forget, but my experience told me that was not going to happen. For some, the devastation of victimization never, ever goes away. While I find that sad, I am not surprised. It is possible Sylvia suffers from C-PTSD—complex PTSD, which occurs from chronic, repetitive stress.

When I shared my publication of Eaglebait with my writers’ group, I was swamped with my colleagues’ stories. Now, these are all retired folks. True, some of their talk involved their children and grandchildren who had experienced bullying. But many of their stories concerned themselves— who bullied them—how and when. As to where, most involved school. The sixty-somethings had not forgotten, though some had figured out and accepted causative factors in their bullies’ motives. I was inspired to write Eaglebait while teaching middle school. Psychology tells us that bullying involves an imbalance of power; middle school provides the perfect storm: three years’ worth of adolescents maturing at different rates physically, emotionally, and educationally, roaming common halls every hour between classes and lumped together in cafeteria, gym and other common areas.

As a teacher, I found that some students managed to rise above the bullying and move on positively; others never seemed to escape the heavy weight of devastation. Is there a way, I wondered, to help teens and tweens manage their way around bullying? I concluded that it boils down to building and maintaining self-esteem. But how to do that? I decided to write a novel to give kids some insight. Eaglebait’s 14-year-old protagonist , Wardy Spinks, is gifted, especially in the sciences, but he has no friends and does not know how to connect with his peers. His troubling home life and anti-social tendencies do not help matters and he is ruthlessly bullied by a group of jocks who entice others to participate through Facebook and texting. Wardy does three things most bully victims can also do:

He tells a responsible adult about the bullying (his grandmother), he finds a science teacher mentor, and, perhaps most importantly, he uses his interest in science to build a laser in his basement, which eventually helps him find other students who are serious about science.

Most school kids have an interest they want to explore or are already good at doing. It can be anything—computers, music, art, math, movies, mechanics, kite-flying. I tell them: Work at what you know and love best to gather a like-minded group of friends. Do tell a responsible adult about the bullying and, if possible, search out a mentor. There is hardly a teacher alive who would reject a student’s request for mentoring, especially in the teacher’s subject area. I cannot count the number of students I mentored as budding writers.

I remember a middle school student whom I did not teach. Tall, awkward and nerdy, the kid was bullied relentlessly in 7th grade. But he was a genius with electronics. He built a big board with buzzers, like College Bowl, went to his teachers for contest questions, and solicited students to compete in an academic contest at a school assembly. The student body could not help but be impressed, and the boy who had been the goat of the school in 7th grade became the hero in the 8th. I’m thinking, this individual has relegated his bullying trauma to the trash pile.

Bullying is a serious situation which can cause lasting consequences. I hope all who touch the lives of youngsters will recognize the importance of self-esteem as an antidote to the poison of bullying and encourage positive steps to raise and maintain that awareness in kids. It might save a lifetime of misery and self-doubt. I encourage you to take a look at Young Adult anti-bullying literature like Eaglebait and consider using it for any type of discussion or study group on bullying. Wardy’s misery will resonate with bullied youngsters and give them some hope for their own recovery.

by Susan Coryell
http://www.susancoryellauthor.com

To order Eaglebait, click the link here: Eaglebait: Can a smart kid survive school bullies?


About the Author

As a free-lance writer, Susan has written for magazines, newspapers, chambers of commerce and professional journals. She also writes for several organizations at Smith Mountain Lake, Virginia, where she and her husband live. She is a member of Authors Guild, Virginia Writers and Smith Mountain Lake Writers.

A career educator, Susan has taught students from 7th grade through college-level. She has a BA degree from Carson-Newman College and a Masters from George Mason University.  She is listed in several volumes of Who’s Who in Education and Who’s Who in Teaching. One of her favorite activities is to talk with budding writers at schools, writers’ conferences and workshops.

She is the author of the award-winning, anti-bullying, young adult novel Eaglebait.

Susan has long been interested in Southern concerns about culture and society, as hard-felt, long-held feelings battle with modern ideas. She was able to explore these ideas in her cozy mystery/Southern Gothic A Red, Red Rose, whose fictional setting is based on Smith Mountain Lake in Southern Virginia.

When not writing, Susan enjoys boating, kayaking, golf and yoga. She and her husband love to travel, especially when grandchildren are involved.

This Emotional Life – Cyberbullying

This Emotional LifeI finally had the chance to watch PBS’s This Emotional Life, that you can find on Netflix and other on-demand services. It was a three-part series that covered many topics, including bullying and cyberbullying.

The segment below, which can be found on YouTube, covers the Cyberbullying segment of the show. I certainly recommend this show for those that want to better understand the emotions that go with the long-term effects and suffering that many feel due to what has happened to them in the past or just the way their mind’s process life’s inputs that happen to them.

High School Friend Writes Internet Safety Book

 

InternetSafetyMy High School friend (and still my friend), Mark Peesel, just published his online book called “Internet Safety for Children“. He was nice enough to call me when he was writing it and ask if he could contribute my story about The Telephone as one of the first Cyberbullying tools used before the internet.

It was very kind of him to include me and the book is both comprehensive and well written. Mark takes the approach of writing both as a parent and as a web development expert that will offer support and help to both parents and children that all need to ensure that they look out for children and even themselves on the internet.

I am proud of my friend, Mark, for taking the effort to write and share these important tips with everyone. And thank you, Mark, for including my story.