The Sports Team Bullies (A Personal Story)

This story seems so unbelievable at times that in 2012 it could happen, but I had a mother tell me a similar story about her son and a high school baseball team coach last year. So believe me that I know this happens. Dan shares the story of his daughter’s trauma dealing with sports team bullying in school. Do you have a similar story? It’s not hazing, it’s definitely bullying. ~Alan Eisenberg

Our daughter used to attend South High School in Torrance, CA and had to switch schools mid semester last year because of bullying. The school only made the problem worse. There are a LOT of details, but I will only put some highlights here. Our daughter was bullied online then attacked by a girl who played with her on the soccer team. The girl went up behind her during lunch in the main lunch area, grabbed her hair, and pulled her head to the ground so hard that she lost consciousness briefly and we later learned had a concussion.

Even though she had a head injury, among other things, the school didn’t even call an ambulance, rather just had her sit in the nurses office. Two days later, the soccer coach actually took a player and team parent vote on who he should kick off the team, basically making it a popularity contest, and kicked our daughter off even after he was told that our daughter would not be kicked off (she was found to have no guilt in the incident). The bully was eventually kicked off and at the end of the year, the coach was told to not let her attend the year-end banquet. When she showed up, he let her attend and also sit right across from our daughter, which made her so upset she had to leave. We raised these issues with the Torrance Unified School District Superintendent and Board of Education, who ruled after the formal process was complete that the school had done nothing wrong. Throughout this ordeal, the principal, Scott, also refused to speak with us or return phone calls several times.

We have since met other people who had bullying experiences at this school that were not addressed. Other schools have mentioned the coach should have definitely been fired just for taking a team vote, yet at this school there are no consequences for anyone.

We have since sold our house this year just for the sake of moving and not having to have our younger son in the Torrance School system. At South High, it was made very clear by Scott that they would never admit to any wrongdoing, or that our daughter was ever in danger, because they then could be held liable for what happened.


4 thoughts on “The Sports Team Bullies (A Personal Story)

  1. I’m sorry for what have happened to your daughter. What they did to her was horrible. I know how your feel as a parent in some way. I had to switch classes in the middle of the year because i was bullied to the point where I didn’t want to go to school the next morning. My parents were devastated that this could happen to me and they thought that it never would. As a parent, it is hard to see your little girl or boy be treated so bad.

  2. I am so sorry for what this girl had to endure every step of the way. How devastating for a family to have to sell a home and relocate…over bullying.

    All of my children were homeschooled. They never saw bullying in a school setting but they did witness bullying in a family setting. They’ve grown up to be amazing anti-bullying adults and we need more of those in this crazy world.

    For Dan, his daughter, and his entire family…I wish you the best. You sound like an incredible family who will do whatever it takes to protect your children from torment. I’m so thankful that you saw what so many parents do not see because their tormented children try to spare everyone the pain of knowing.

    I admire you more than words can say and I wish you the best. Thank you for sharing your story. Thank you for everything you’ve done in the best interest of your child.

  3. Hi it’s Christina (xtina) again and I have another story for your blog.

    When I was in highschool, I had an algebra teacher who constantly bullied me. It was at a private Christian school, but she was rotten to the core.

    It all started on the first day of highschool when I walked into her extended algebra class. The administration put me there because I didn’t do well as far as math scores go. Also, I have ADD so that was strike 2 against me. Strike 3 was the fact this I was a non athlete and wore big metal beads back then, which in her book meant punk rocker=troublemaker. I was anything but a troublemaker. I tried to be a good girl.

    I remember one day during class she was bragging about her daughter getting tickets to see Journey. I tried to level with her about My aspirations to see Avalon, a popular Christian band at the time. I told her about how I couldn’t afford it, but I was not begging for money. Instead I was gonna get my dad to take me. Her response was a very coarse “GET A JOB!” I was only 15. Texas law says you must be 16 to get a job.

    Then there was one day during homecoming week where she got really mad at me and a friend. Said friend couldn’t get a problem right and she started telling her tersely “am I pissing you off” repeatedly so much that se was in tears. She did the same to me. I told my parents about the incident. They called her up in the school phone book (her daughter attended the school) and she apologized to my parents, but not to me or the other girl.

    Another time, my senior year, I was lamenting to her about a workout regime and a vacation to California with my parents. She mocked me. Ironically enough the week was called “3 days with Jesus” and we were supposed to be helping out others. I guess she missed the part of the bible that said “love your neighbor as yourself.” Mocking & targeting someone is not love.

    I had her for nearly 4 years in highschool. For an alleged Christian at a Christian highschool, she conducted herself in a very unchristlike manner. She is still employed at that school. Christina

  4. Christina,
    What a pathetic, miserable woman. She sounds like the typical “misery loves company” pieces of work whose only sense of (false) pleasure comes from taking others down a notch.

    I hope she didn’t succeed with you. Those things leave their ugly claw marks but they don’t have to define us.

    You seem very discerning—seeing her for the mocker that she was (Proverbs does call them mockers). I predict that you will go through life treating people the exact opposite as what that woman chose to do with her God-given free-will.

    I wish you the best as you go through your days treating people with kindness!

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