Bully Documentary In Theaters March 30th

A new documentary movie called “Bully” is being released. The movie is set to premiere on March 30th in theaters around the country. This powerful film takes an in-depth look at the bullying crisis taking place in this country. This movie looks to be a no holds barred view of the problem taking place in our schools and communities and looks to be  a must viewing for our schools and kids.

The only issue looks to be that the MPAA wants to give the film an “R” rating, basically making it a movie that will be unavailable to be viewed by those under 17. This would effectively ban the movie from being viewed in schools. Currently, the filmmaker, which is the The Weinstein Company, is trying to have that changed. You can learn more about the petition to change the rating at the Care2 site.

Again, the movie will be released to theaters on March 30th. Here’s the preview of the movie:

Originally posted on Bullying Stories:

Jasmine at Onlinecolleges.net shared a blog article they posted on 15 famous and successful people who have shared their stories of being bullied. This helps us all by sharing our stories and hearing from “famous” people that they also went through some tough times.

Bullying can make a student want to stay home and never go back, opting instead for online college courses. While these may be valid for many fields of study, being bullied is not a valid reason to do one. Bullying can leave long-lasting scars that taking classes from home can’t fix.

A few examples from the article include:

Michael Phelps (Olympic Swimmer)
In 2008, Michael Phelps earned respect worldwide for his performance at the Beijing Olympic Games, as he earned the title of greatest Olympian ever with his all-time record for most individual gold Olympic medals, a total of nine. And although he has been called…

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Bullying Scars For Life (A Personal Story)

A few months ago Mike submitted a story shared here called “Daydreams & Nightmares”. His story was very close to my own and shared both a personal knowledge of being bullied. Mike has submitted a second story to share here called “Bullying Scars for Life”, again sharing a very personal and real perspective to what it is like to live with the long-term pain and effects from bullying. ~Alan Eisenberg

Bullying Scars for Life

Bullying can scar you for life.  After graduating from high school my life followed a hypersensitive crumbling path. The next eight years are a medicated blur, and yet, simultaneously, a calculated demonstration of survival tactics. Most of the names are forgotten but not the pummeling pain of existence. Just thinking about those days causes me to be physically debilitated as I try to transmit the daily trauma across these computer keys.

I was living in an apartment with one of many different roommates I would have as I scraped towards a college degree. I awoke on this Tuesday in October of the fall of 1980. My first class was at 8:00 and as usual my intention to be prepared had not come to fruition. I showered and consumed my usual two bowls of Captain Crunch. I chewed on the right because two teeth on the left were hurting bad. I hadn’t made it through a dentist appointment in over four years. Fulfilling the minimum hygienic expectations, I then initiated the survival techniques for the day. The pistachio supply was adequate and positioned in all the key locations; a handful in the two front pockets of my jeans, half a bag in my coat inside pocket, and another bag for backup placed under my passenger seat. This was going to be a distinctly tougher day as I had not been able to get my hands on the yellow pills for quite a few days.

Driving towards school, the radio was set on a golden oldies station as I drifted into my safe world of daydreams. I found some peace while I drove since I was in control and it was a place where I could be the person I always wanted to be. Today, I found solace as an amazing tennis player wowing the world with win after win at Wimbledon. Pulling into the school lot, I longed for that John Denver song to just go on and on so that the crowds would keep cheering. As I headed pass the baseball field towards the campus, I transformed myself and was now invisible. This was the absolute key to surviving for the day. I had given up on directing every neuron and fiber towards the cause of looking cool. I wasn’t anything but a piece of dirt that wandered through each day wondering why was I of such little significance in this world.

I took the usual path working my way through the halls passing hundreds of students. They were not peers since there was no relationship or connection. I glanced at the pretty girls, envied the guys they were talking to, and wished so deeply that I could just be a part of all this. As I passed my class room I glanced in, considered entering for a second and then proceeded on by.  Like a ghost, shy of any typical frightening intentions of a ghoul, I slipped quietly into the school library.  The girl behind the desk was gorgeous. For days I had worked on fooling my internal guards so that I could say hello to this beauty.

As I approached the desk, it started. The symptoms were always centered on my left side. The muscles around my mouth started quivering as I began to bite down hard on my lips. The corner of my mouth started to twitch. The tongue began pushing against the bottom part of my mouth and then slashed across the inside of my teeth. The elbow flickered and the fingers moved almost uncontrollably. Popping a pistachio I chewed feverishly as I got the next nut under my upper lip. It was too late. I was in overdrive and was escalating out of control. As my mind maneuvered feverishly to control my anatomy, the physiological elements finished me off. Breathing rapidly increased, the left leg was gripped by a vise, and the foot felt heavy. The throat muscles tightened as all parts of my mouth moved incessantly. The panic set in as I emptied my last sources of energy to avoid collapsing. I was now a moment away from dry heaving. At this point, I knew there was no way I was going to move forward. Now my only chance of avoiding total embarrassment was to get out. So I did.

I walked around the perimeter of the campus to avoid as many people as possible. As I hit a quiet stretch, I could feel myself slowly settling down. No one was around which meant there was no one to impress… which meant I could return to my safe point of invisibility. Another day at school had been attempted with a recurring result. No classes were attended, no schoolwork was completed and I headed home elevated in stress and depleted in self-worth.

In order to reset my vitals to a functioning level, I had to separate my mind from reality. I got back to the apartment, slouched onto the sofa and turned on the TV. Cable had not yet come to pass so I had to settle for the soaps on one of the three network stations. After an hour, I was feeling better, but was quite aware that phase-two of surviving the day was soon to arrive.

I worked about five days a week at Sears in the paint and sporting goods department. It was time to now get prepared. The problem with this job was that I had to talk with many people during each shift. The bigger problem was that I was paralyzed with fear that I would dry heave while interacting with co-workers and customers. Over time certain foods seemed to be more effective to help me keep cool. Lately, I found that popsicles had become short-term tranquilizers. It just happened that we had a refrigerator just behind the warehouse doors in my department. So before clocking in I went next door and picked up a box of assorted flavored popsicles.  Quickly, I noticed that my body and mind was still ultra-tense. As customers asked questions my symptoms were returning. The throat tightened, the mouth muscles went spastic and my left side stiffened. I was good for about four minute intervals before I had to get to that freezer and take a bite of my popsicle.  Think about the level of tension that existed over the four hour shift.

After two hours I was drained. The department manager called me over to discuss inventory paperwork. When I was in this state, I felt like I was choking if I couldn’t get to my relief valve. As Tom spoke to me, I couldn’t decipher a thing that he was saying. My mind was totally zoomed in on avoiding a dry heave. Both legs grew heavier and more painful by the second. My mouth was hyper as I tried to survive and acknowledge Tom’s directions. Finally, exhausted I collapsed to my knees placing my head in my arms. Tom was bewildered and asked what was wrong. Holding back tears, I mumbled that I was fighting a flu. The strangest thing was that whenever I gave up, the pressures would cease and I always felt a few moments of serenity. Tom sympathetically released me and I slowly weaved through the stock room to the punch clock. By the time I got to my car, I was numb in a similar way as the night before and the night before that. When I arrived home, I turned on the TV. Two hours later I began to drift off, sadly aware that I would go through all of this again when the sun rose tomorrow.

 ~Mike S. (Author of Bullied)

A New Video on Cyberbullying is Worth Watching

I just saw this excellent video posted on you tube called “Cyberbullying PSA by Christina and Maeryl”. Not only does it have good cyberbullying information, but also includes a very well thought out video. I hope you find it as worthwhile as I did and share with others that need this message as well.

The Hood (A Personal Story)

Sometimes people send me stories and have a lot to say in them. Sometimes, I get a very simple story with few words. Many times, the few words can say more than the longer stories. There is something in this one I felt that way with. I like how “A” was plain and simple and to the point, particularly the last paragraph. ~Alan Eisenberg

In 1964 I was in the 7th grade and was bullied and beaten by three classmates in a Catholic School in Brooklyn NY. At 5’10” and skinny -I stood out from the other girls. Note, I was not friends with any of the girls and had no words with them.

Two of the girls set up the third to challenge me by hitting me. The two stood and watched as the third Girl (a doctor’s daughter proceeded to beat me up) . When the two girls saw I was thrashing her they proceeded to stomp on my feet.

Quite frankly, I defended myself rather well, as the Doctor’s daughter never returned to the school . The two girls were hoods and the doctors daughter was taken out of the school because of her association with them.

I returned to school the next day holding my head up high. The nuns said nothing. By the way one of the hoods smacked me in the face in front of the Church later on in the term. I did not defend myself that day. She was a hood.

Thank you.


A Pacifist’s Anger

Author and fellow anti-bullying contributor Karen Mueller Coombs asked me to guest blog on her website. She just posted my blog/story called “A Pacifist’s Anger”, in which I share some insights into my stories and more depth about my feelings of what happened to me.

If you would like to read my guest, blog titled “A Pacifist’s Anger, you can see it on her “Bully at Ambush Corner website at: http://bullyatambushcorner.com/2012/02/20/a-pacifists-anger/

Dealing with The Boss (A Personal Story)

I received this post from Xtina, who shares her story of trying to start her career and her troubles in the workplace. She works in the media field and I know first-hand as well how egos clash with trying to get the work done in this arena. It is supposed to be fun and exciting work, but many times the sometimes fragile egos of those in the creative field can clash with allowing others to shine. Xtina shares her perspective on these early days below. ~Alan Eisenberg

Who am I? I am Xtina (I’m not using my real name because of my profession) and I am a writer. I write for a somewhat major publication in Houston, TX.

Growing up, I was raised in a Southern Baptist home. However, I went to a Lutheran school from 3rd grade right up until I graduated highschool in 2005. Being a southern Baptist (now ex-southern Baptist, but still a christian) at a Lutheran school was a lot like introducing a grown dog to a cat: someone’s gonna get scratched or bitten.

Teachers would sometimes frown upon me because I was Baptist and we played the rich Baptist school, which the church I grew up in owned. But even worse: when I would attend church on sunday and we lost in football and they won against us, the people in the youth group would poke fun at me. Also, the youth ministers at the church I attended would always come to the Baptist school but never the Lutheran one. That made me feel very unwelcome at a church I had loved. I didn’t want to be there anymore.

I eventually changed churches. I started going to a Vineyard church near my house and after 3 years, I am still there because I loved it.

Now fast forward to 2011: I had just graduated from college with my Bachelors in Communications-Broadcast Journalism and I had just finished an internship at a voiceover studio. I get a rather demanding call from this guy who works at this online SEO marketing firm. He offers me an internship/production manager position as a technical writer – essentially I’m a fancified proofreader of websites they were trying to develop. They also wanted someone who had experience in WordPress. I had experience in WordPress in the form of my own blog, The Wild Heart. So I was hired.

The first day I get there my boss, the CEO, treats me terribly. He lets others talk, but not me. I would talk about my hobby which was my blog but he wanted ABSOLUTELY NO SMALL TALK WHATSOEVER!

But one day he really hurt my feelings when after work he was showing me some stuff on WordPress and I mentioned I wanted to turn my own blog into a paying entity – like what Perez Hilton has. He laughed in my face and said “that’s never gonna work.” I wanted to cry but instead went to the record store and treated myself to some of the best of my favorite artists: Billy Joel, Fleetwood Mac, Stevie Nicks, and a few others.

Oh and did I mention the pay was a joke? It was only $150 a month. He expected me to buy with my own money a laptop. I ended up not doing so because I really wanted tickets to see Stevie Nicks when she came to town. (tickets were a whopping $79.50 per ticket)

He did this repeatedly. One day I wasn’t doing anything except for working and a new guy asked if there was any mac users that worked there. I told him I did and my boss tells him that I don’t know anything. I’ve had a mac since 2005 and I use an iPhone. Yeah I know nothing about macs. I went back to the record store and ended up spending $40 there. I was so upset and hurt by his comments.

It was also around this time he kept sending me Facebook friend requests as well as twitter requests. I didn’t want him on ANY of my social networks because those are devoted mostly to either my personal stuff and or my blog. I felt like he was spying on me in the off hours. Like for example he would have found out that after I took care of my mom who had surgery, I went to a tribute concert on the other side of town. I was reporting/tweeting about said concert for my blog which he so hated.

As time wore on, things got progressively worse. He gave me worthless tasks such as seeing if all the pics come up on his cd and going through a book of 1,000+ OTC contacts and manually checking to see if they had a bad website. Oh and he was going to force us all to go to an all male minimum security prison and listen to business pitches from inmates for some prison ministry program he was trying to woo into being a client. It made me feel very uneasy to go so I took the option he proposed of not going.

By this time the treatment I was getting was taking its toll on me. I remember having outbursts of anger and constantly complaining about the job. I also started looking for another job, which he found out about.

But one day he stooped REAL low and started giving me “advice” in the form of insults about my hair, weight and clothes. Luckily he let me off early that day. I wanted to cry and did. He apologized but I think it was only because he got caught. I told my best friend about what happened and she told me I needed to quit.

One day I got an email about that OTC spreadsheet saying get it done NOW so I decided that it was time to quit. I had had it with his crap! So I told him via email that I quit immediately. I know I won’t be able to use him as a reference – like I would want to use that dirtbag anyway. After that he made my life hell for a day in the form of 6 calls in one day followed by 1 call each day till thanksgiving.

However, a month later, I found a dream job. I was looking through my favorite rock blog and found out they were seeking new writers. I sent them my samples and they hired me. My former boss said I would never make it as a writer and I slowly but surely am.