The documentary film, working title “Bullying: Long Term Effects” will begin shooting in the near future. We are currently trying to line up interviews with well-known and not so well-known adults who wish to contribute their stories and feelings about bullying to the documentary.
We are also looking for funding for this project. Our dream is to create a documentary that can be played in theaters as well as in educational classrooms. We would also like to have a support website that will allow for active communication on the subject from an educational standpoint.
If you are interested in being interviewed or can help with funding options to make this project a reality, please contact me at: bullyinglte@gmail.com
I’ve got a working title for the film. It will be called “8 Days Lost: The Long-term Effects of Bullying”. If you don’t know why I’m going with that title, read my blog called “The Long & Winding Road”.
May 28th, 2007 at 7:21 am
My husband and son are both dyslexic. My husband is a physician but his life is not a success because of his bulling experiences as achild.He has low regard for himself ,has rage issues and is basically sad. This became more evident when our son was bullied for years when we moved to Fla.The bullying was emotionally unbearable, by retaliatin of the school district.My husband was in denial when I needed him most.He could not advocate effectively ,it was too painful I suppose and I was too emotional.I was in a hyper anxiety state . bullying destroyed all of us for a while.We are trying to work through it all and we going for family counciling .Iknow my husband would want to help others by telling his story
November 1st, 2007 at 8:06 am
I have had a very similar experience as the writer above has had. I would very much like to share our story with you. I am considering sueing the school district for the lack of support they gave to my son. We have actually had to move so my son can go to another school, (not public). Our family is also now in counseling dealing with this. Why do the victims have to pay the price. I am very concerned for my sons future. He was a very thoughtful, loving child. He always wanted to make friends and always stood up for the underdog. Now at 14 he is trying to deal with on-going anger issues, anxiety and low self worth. I am a counselor for families and children, and I see this problem becoming much more prevelent over the last few years. I can speculate on the many reasons as to why. I am hoping your documentary will shed some light as to why this is such a rampent problem, why schools are not stopping it, and what we can do to protect the victims and help the perpatrators.
Please contact me any time so I can support your efforts and project.
Sincerely,
Dianne
April 23rd, 2008 at 3:35 am
I was bullied in middle school, and today I am a teacher in middle school. I see bullying every day, and I promise you it makes my blood boil. I remember having to walk a different way in the hall each day, the terror I felt when I did end up seeing her, and the taunting day in and day out from her and her friends. Kids are so cruel.The school did not protect me, and finally my parents pulled me out the last few weeks before 8th grade graduation. I was a good kid, making good grades, and it all started over a boy that this girl liked, who liked me?! I think it is so strange how you can be terrified by someone you really don’t even know. My experience with bullying, does help me to advocate against bullying in my school. At least I can positively pay it forward.
January 17th, 2012 at 6:01 pm
a bullying unit started in my school and i see the pain
September 22nd, 2008 at 6:38 pm
awe that sucks dude
September 22nd, 2008 at 6:39 pm
i fell your pain im being bullyed and its sad
December 5th, 2008 at 9:32 pm
I was born as the 4th child. I was bullied at home, and add to fact I was very small for my age I was also a prime target all the school kids. The bulling at home left me scared and with very low self esteem, and no self confidence. This put a hugh target on my back for bullies at school. Now 35 yrs later not much has changed about my low esteem no self confidence. And I also have no ambition and a complete fear of confrontation of any kind. I remember every bully vividly and still have nightmares about those times.
November 9th, 2010 at 9:05 am
Actually bully wants this for you,he want to terrerize you to low self esteem
you must read some good self help books and read my blog too,www.coachfaisal.wordpress.com,,,God will take you out of this very soon if you dare to take action
February 28th, 2009 at 6:59 pm
I am 19 going on 20 years old and suffer from a high functioning form of Asperger’s Syndrome. After I left a school for special needs children – teens (a school which I went to for 5 years and had no summer programs), I entered my freshman year at high school. I did have a history of many high functioning autistic tendencies in childhood years. Although I tended to do my best to follow the code of conduct, succeed in work completion, and make friends, I did have some issues which made me oblivious to certain things. I tried making friends, including those in my special education program. It has been been said typically that when you make friends, you have to get to know each other a bit. But that was one mistake I made. I didn’t expect peers at the school to be so immature and obnoxious. Even whatever I said, especially with certain topics, would make some students feel stunned or laugh. Although it was embarrassing and I could tell they thought it was awkward, I couldn’t tell why they would think I was being awkward with whatever I said. No matter how friendly and helpful peers were towards me, a number of them bullied me for one main reason. They made crying noises at me, because I couldn’t stand to hear the sound of crying, especially from babies. Even when movies where on, I walked out of the crying scenes. I have told teachers / staff members / security / even my social counselor about my situations. I always did this so some disciplinary action would be brought on those who tend and prone to belittle me like I’m a nothing / chode / you name it and I’m the weak link. I have learned that students with special needs and developmental disabilities who go to mainstream public schools and attend mainstream classes become easy targets for bullying. This included an overwhelming number of students with Autism Spectrum Disorders (including Asperger’s Syndrome).
-Obsessive interests, activities, and topics of conversation,
-limited interests,
-illiteracy to body language, facial expressions, emotions, seriousness, what others think
-few or no friends,
-sensitivities, anxiety, fears of certain situations / things, emotional problems,
-predilection for certain routines,
-incredible knowledge of interests / academics and little knowledge learning and understanding of other academics or other certain things,
-lack of appropriate social skills,
-weak communication skills,
-some speech problems,
-Social Awkwardness despite ways of understanding the world and environment,
-repetitive behaviors,
-clumsiness
-little awarness
-sometimes speech problems and little eye contact are evident
-shyness
All this is evident within an individual struggling with life with Asperger’s Syndrome.
Anyone has strength and weakness, including those who have special needs, no matter what functioning level.
March 1st, 2009 at 4:25 pm
I just came across this page. I experienced bullying as a child. The school did nothing except giving my parents bad advice. My teacher told them just to forget about the issue and it would pas by itself. It did not. As an adult I experienced bullying at work. I could not work for a while and decided to get help. The health professionals I talked with did not have any knowledge about the issue of bullying and basicly told me it was my foult. I could not accept that and started to look for information on my own. Because of my education I can read research papires, and have a good understanding of what is being discussed in the papire. The future looks bright. I have a good job. And for the first time in my life I actually enjoy my work.
March 16th, 2009 at 6:31 pm
i would like to make a documentary about this subjet so important in this mind world, thanks all of you for give me a bit exjample about bullying and how bad is live with this kind of people around as.
April 22nd, 2009 at 4:47 am
I have a daughter in 4th grade right now who has been bullied all year long and the school has known about it and they have done nothing to protect her or help her. I tell them she is my hero and they laugh at me. but she gets up and goes to school everyday with kids who make fun of her for no particular reason. she does have adhd and odd and bipolar and she is lacking certain social skills and the school refuses to put her in a social skills group (which they have) to help her better deal with these bullies. They say she’s had social skills groups and she should have enough skills to deal with these situations but she she doesn’t my question to them is how can she use skills she doesn’t have?? I asked my daughter if the teachers see and know about the bullying and she said yes they just look the other way?? I have been on the schools back since day one they have done nothing to help her does anyone out there have any ideas on how to handle this? I’ve already hired an attorney she said it would be hard to get the city to pay for my daughter to go to a different school because she is very bright and can still mantain her grades. I say what do we have to do wait till she has a breakdown? Any advice would be greatly appreciated. I cry every night after I put her to bed. She’s 9.
April 26th, 2009 at 5:10 am
My 13-year old daughter was diagnosed with Non-verbal Learning Disorder (NLD) which falls under the spectrum of Asperger’s. Much of what you experienced and the symptoms you describe are exactly or very similar to what she’s going through. She’s socially awkward with her peers and to add to her social difficulties, she’s quite overweight and is relentlessly harassed and bullied by kids at school (both boys and girls). She’s not like most of the girls at her school, i.e., she doesn’t wear make-up, isn’t into fashion, doesn’t swear, is quite shy, is quiet and respectful to teachers, has only one friend that she hangs out with at school at school. Several mean girls have been passing rumors at school that she’s gay, that her one and only friend is her “girlfriend.” One called her a “big fat pig with hair” (she’s got thick wavy hair) and told her she needed liposuction. She has called me from school in tears and embarrassment over things they’ve said and done. I’ve complained to the school many, many times and the harassment continuess as she becomes more and more depressed and her grades continue to plummet. It’s my intent now to file formal harassment charges against the main “players” as well as the school for failing to protect her by taking action against the main perpetrators. I can truly understand the suffering you went through at school as a result of the cruelty and rudeness of ignorant kids who thought they were so much better and “cooler” than you and the betrayal you must have felt from teachers and school staff for doing nothing when reported. Shame on them! You sound like someone who would make a great mentor for kids who are dealing with these issues. Just keep your head held high, be yourself, and know that you’re ten times a better person than any of tho bullies you’ll encounter in your life!
October 22nd, 2009 at 2:34 pm
What is the status of your documentary film? Are you still working on it?
October 22nd, 2009 at 2:45 pm
Yes, Nikki, I am still at work on it. Best laid plans and all, it’s still in development as they say. I am working on storyboarding some of it and then still trying to time trips and interviews.
November 17th, 2009 at 8:14 pm
Hello,
I unfortunately have been the target of long term bullying within the workplace. I have always considered myself a strong individual and have worked in industries that relied on such qualties. If you would have told me before I started in my new role in 2005 that I would end up being diagnosed with PTS, Depression and Anxiety due to ongoing bullying from my peers I would have told you that you were crazy. In 2009 I am still suffering the impact of what I have endured, and the total lack of understanding, support etc from management made it worse. I have attempted suicide, giving my children back to my ex husband and returning my long term foster son back to DOCS, leaving my husband. I have 2 daughters who do not speak to me and it is not that they don’t love me, its because they are scared. Families are the unforseen victims of bullying, what I have put them through. I would like to help anyone who is trying to deal with this and help people to understand what it is like to go through this.
December 25th, 2009 at 7:02 pm
I don’t know if you guys are still seeking people, but if you are, I survived 10 years of bullying in a small mid west town and because in such a small town your classes and the surrounding classes are pretty close to the same in fourth grade as it is when you graduate high-school there really is no escape. I have sent an email to the above address, and I hope to hear from you soon. Thank you for listening.
January 25th, 2010 at 5:38 pm
I have a son who is beginning to break down on us due to bullying in 4th grade. He is now in the 6th grade and completely depressed and anxious. He hasn’t been to school in over a month. He’s extremely bright and it tears us apart to see what he’s becoming. He’s unmotivated, sad, says he hates his life, wants to die! Therapists say is post tramatic stress from 4th grade when he was bullied relentlessly, the school did nothing. He then went to middle school and we thought it would be ok. New kids and time had passed. But he says the scars are so deep he doesn’t know if they will ever go away. If you do need to interview people, our son is very articulate and not shy. He’ll tell you everything, and then some. I think he feels better talking about it knowing people are listening t him. If we could help anyone from having to go through this we would. It SUCKS!!! I think our next step is to try to sue the school and get them to pay for at home tutoring. We’ll see.
January 26th, 2010 at 12:39 pm
Hi Sue! I think that it is the right thing to do to sue the school. I do not know your son, butI do not think that it is the best thing for him in the long run to have home tutoring. I have been bullied a lot, and like your son I have experienced post traumatic stress. From my experiences I know it does very little good to isolate one self. I have been there and done that. If I could give you only one advice, it would be too seek out a private school who take bullying seriously AND to get the public school system to pay for it. Your son deserves so much better that what the public school system has given him. Plz tell your son that there is hope. If I could fight my way through most of it on my own, he will have a better chance of doing it with the loving help he gets from you and everyone else who cares.
February 16th, 2010 at 7:34 am
It has been 4 years and 8 months since our son died by suicide. He was 18 years old. I keep replaying his life over and over again in my mind trying to understand what trigger the depression which started in 8th grade after a football injury. He received treatment during this time with an antidepressant and was weaned off of the medication within 6 months. Sadly, in the spring of his senior year of high school, I saw the signs of depression returning. I was so worried and knew he needed professional help. Our family doctor started him back on the antidepressant that he took previously. Two weeks after taking the antidepressant, our son had the courage to admit to me that he had tried to hang himself but got scared. Our doctor referred us to a psychiatrist who we saw immediately. My husband, our son and myself sat together in his office while he did his evaluation. Our son shared with the psychiatrist that he attempted to take his life. The psychiatrist never suggested a crisis unit. He was diagnosing our son with social anxiety and wanted to change his antidepressant to a new drug which he thought had better results. I questioned the controversy of antidepressants in teens that they enhance suicidal tendencies. He didn’t think there would be a problem. He rescheduled an appointment for two weeks. The second week our son was on this antidepressant, his anxiety was ready to go through the roof. We call the psychiatrist about his anxiety and it didn’t seem alarming to him. He said he would see us at his next appointment in a few days. Our son succeeded to hang himself in our basement the day before his next visit. The agony of finding my son and living this nightmare everyday since his death is torture.
I happened to come across this website and want to share that our son was bullied in 2nd through 4th grade. Finally in November of his 4th grade year, I transfer him from our parish Catholic school to a private Catholic school. Our son was a kind, happy and smart student. Sadly, his class had a small number of boys in his class. Two boys were bullies who targeted our son. Michael kept a lot of this abuse to himself but finally shared some of it with me. I took this opportunity to observe for myself how they were teasing him in the cafeteria. I saw it for myself as I peeked in the hallway without telling Michael. I reported it to the principal who did nothing to help the situation. So, I thought transferring him was the only option. He did well at the private Catholic all boy school. Freshmen year at a coed Catholic high school again had some occasions of bullying.
I keep trying to figure out what hurt Michael so much that made his life difficult to live. I believe the bullying played a part in lowering his self esteem. He loved sports but had some coaches who wanted to win the trophy then let all the kids play.
Michael was an average player and didn’t complain, so he sat the bench. I also think that Michael suppressed his feelings. Depression is in both of our families which put our son in a higher category for being predispose to mental illness.
Bullying leaves permanent scars that never go again. A couple weeks after Michael’s death, our family (we have a younger daughter and son) went to a grief therapist. One of the first questions he ask us was Michael bullied?
God bless your project and I pray that sharing Michael’s story will help someone else.
November 2nd, 2010 at 8:37 pm
My daughter is a victim of bullying at school. I have begun my research today to find out what I can do at the school and for other children who are being bullied.
She is at a behavioral hospital now dealing with the effects of bullying. She chose to cut herself rather than deal with the words her peers chose to use towards her. I want to find a way to make the schools understand that there is more they can do……
I went to the school and didn’t get the help we wanted. I thought I could help her through it but I had no idea how extensive the damage was.
November 3rd, 2010 at 9:10 am
I am so sorry to hear what you’re going through. It’s scary what kids could do to other kids and they just don’t get it. My post was the one a few above from Sue. About my 6th grader. My best advice to you would be to pull her out of school and get the school to pay for a homebound tutor. My feeling is that keeping her in the situation day after day does nothing but hurt her more. We tried that, until talks of suicide started happening. We pulled my son out of school last February, hired a lawyer who got him to be tutored from home for the remainder of the year on the towns bank account. Then it’s been an emotional roller coaster since as we wanted him back to school for Sept. but in a private school away from the animals that surrounded him. And we set out to make the town pay for it. We feel since they did nothing to help the situation, they were liable. We just went to mediation last week and we did get a very nice settlement for his private school. He’s at a great place now and is very happy there. You could say what you want about private schools but there’s just a different caliber of kids at these schools from what we see. They actually respect one another. It’s really amazing. Now things aren’t perfect, as I still see my son very reluctant to get close to any kids. He wants friends but keeps them at a distance. There is no trust there. It’s sad to watch but I just pray that in time, that will change. He also gets extremely anxious if there’s too much pressure on him. He just can’t deal with that. So every day is still a challenge but hopefully we are going in the right direction. We could only hope and pray. But the key is to have everything in writing when you correspond to the school so there is a paper trail to show that nothing was getting done and your daughters problems are a direct result of their ignorance. And get your daughter out of the situation asap. It’s not worth it. I will be praying for your daughter and your family as I know this is a really tough time for you. Good Luck.
November 4th, 2010 at 1:03 am
Sue.
Come on. That’s one way of advocating for your bullied child… get a settlement to send him to a private school where there’s a “caliber” of children that you approve of.
I will spare you the written backhand – but PARENTS raise children, and it takes all kinds of PARENTS to raise all types of CHILDREN/TEENS of all types of FISCAL STATURE landing them in differing educational institutions. For God’s sake. Private schools have better caliber kids. You think kids aren’t going to be targeted in private schools? You think your son won’t be targeted in private school? Better get your paper trail fingers handy.
Sorry to get nasty, I’m not an internet troll… Just one mother to another. And a few other experience(s) I won’t list. But wow. You sound like a litigator’s dream come true… just don’t forget your son and the fact that this is HIS experience… there are long term effects to being bullied. He might need a mother.
God. Sorry. I’m just uptight, and your reply triggered something.
November 4th, 2010 at 9:45 am
Who the hell do you think you are? You have NO clue what we’ve been through the past year. How dare you say he needs a mother. Sounds like you’re no better then the bullies. I was only trying to help and explain my experience. We tried the public school way for 3 years and it only got worse. Putting salt in a wound day after day isn’t exactly the best medicine. In MY experience, the best thing for me was to remove my son from the situation. In doing so, he’s in a yes, private school because the kids are monitored much more closely and are in very small classrooms. Many of the kids have had similar situations. There are advisors that meet with kids daily and address any issue as they happen. Of course things happen everywhere, but it’s a lot different when they are made accountable for their actions. I’m not saying that’s the only way, but I was merely offering some ideas that may seem hopeful to those who need it. Because I know, many times, we felt that we had no options and I know I appreciated any ideas when I received them. I certainly didn’t berate anyone for trying to offer a little help or empathy. It’s been a living hell for my son (HIS experiences) and my family so don’t you dare judge me. Of course there’s long term effects of bullying, I see them daily, but we’re just on a different path right now. Hopefully upwards as I am an optimist. Thanks for the uplifting support and stop you’re bullying.
November 28th, 2010 at 9:41 pm
I would love to contribute my story. I left a comment on
another page of your website. I was bullied for so many years-more than 10-and went to school in Lexington. I look forward to speaking with you!
December 10th, 2010 at 8:45 pm
I’d be glad to be part of your project. I am pretty sure the bullying I received from grades K-6 set me up for an abusive relationship as an adult. The people who crapped on me keep popping up on facebook to alleviate their guilt and apologize. Every time I just don’t know what to say. Am I supposed to exonerate them? Make them feel better? Tell them I’m over it? I think I’m over it till another one pops up. ugh.
May 19th, 2011 at 10:04 am
Please visit my site: http://www.peerabuse.net as I am interested in speaking to you…..
September 21st, 2011 at 8:31 pm
i was bullied in high school…..
October 5th, 2011 at 5:41 pm
Bullying sucks. Me, I have a high function Autism, which sets me apart from everyone else. People have called me retarded, stupid, freak, and many more. I’ve even been told that I wouldnt be able to do some things like read, write, ride a bike, take a public bus anywhere, get a job, and graduate high school. Well, I proved them wrong. I’m 20 years old, working for the St. Vrain Valley School District in Food Services for the past year and 1/2, Graduated from Longmont High in 2010, learned in a few days about the public bus system and rode them everywhere, I’m studying for the Colorado State CNA test (keeping fingers crossed if I pass), and I’ve done many more. Before I graduated high school, I have experienced name calling, pushing and pulling, threats (physically and online), came close to suicide, drank alcohol and did drugs, and became socially depressed. All bullying started at elementary school in Golden, CO and went onto my senior year in high school in Longmont, CO. Only one person cared for me other than my parents and that was my wonderful, Father-like counselor, Mr. B. He helped me sober up and he helped me understand that I am fine the way I am and NOBODY can change that but me.
February 29th, 2012 at 5:33 pm
wow… omg I feel sorry for you all I can’t say i was ever bullied but i felt the pain sometimes. I hate when stupid people have nothing better to do but bully kids! That’s why i am standing up against bullies and for the other kids that are being bullied!
April 1st, 2012 at 10:47 pm
I am 11 and in 5th grade. I have a kindle fire and one of the games I have has a message board. I was looking on it one day and saw that a girl had said that I was stupid. She didn’t even know me! I asked her why and she said that her brother was cooler than me. I happen to be an award winning dancer. She said I wasn’t a dancer because I fall on my butt. She even called me the b word! I need help. Tell me what to do! I already deleted the game but I am hurt.HELP!